I often use the metaphor of dance to describe different processes—life is a dance, partnering is a dance, finding balance within is a dance. Sometimes we choose one dance, while someone else chooses another. Sometimes we choose one dance when another would help us feel better, or give us better results. Listen to your inner dialogue. Are you doing modern dance when jazz would work better for you?
     Lately, I’ve noticed how attached many of us are to our stories—to the meaning we make out of our circumstances. I see some individuals who would rather get a divorce than consider shifting perspective about their relationship. I see others, who would prefer to hold resentment, anger, sadness, pain, hurt or fear, rather than let it go. There are those who consider themselves to be enlightened, creating a story about how their issue is influenced by a past life or an astrological occurrence. Of course, when I word it this way, it seems absurd. But, I’m sure each of us is aware of many times when we felt justified in an opinion about a situation or person…even if it made us miserable! What do we do about it?
     We need to be present to ‘what is.’ The easiest way to do this is to start practicing! Make it a priority to experience each moment, each person, as though you were visiting earth for the first time. Tell yourself that everything is exactly the way it should be in this moment. Notice any emotion that begins to arise and welcome it as an ‘early warning system’ that alerts you to your ego’s game. Thank your body for giving you a ‘head’s up’ with that knotted stomach or tightened jaw, so that you can attend to your thoughts immediately. Then, listen to your internal dialogue, and realize that you are making up a story about what is happening in that moment.
        Finally, realize you can choose a different story! You will begin to detach from the intensity of the situation, and you will feel relaxed in your body and emotions. Eventually, you can move into releasing internal dialogue completely, so that you are only experiencing each moment without attaching meanings to it. There will be no mind chatter. You will discover a dance of peace.
     Whenever we find ourselves with a thought, feeling, or story that is difficult to manage, we may need help to change it. Think of it as dance lessons! Some find success by training themselves with mind techniques, like meditation, or body techniques, like tai chi. Others need someone to coach them through a practice like The Work of Byron Katie, or a process like hypnotherapy, to let go of old stories. We only have this moment in which to choose a new dance. What are you waiting for?